Whole life insurance before...your 401k?

I had just met with some folks who had recently moved in-state from the East Coast. They were referred to me because they were unhappy with the advisor that they’d been with. The advisor had worked for one of those big insurance companies that also have their own proprietary mutual funds.

The advisor had always made the claim to them that he could use any type of investment that he wanted. What I found funny about that statement was when you actually looked at their account holdings, over 80% of all their investments were with that company’s mutual funds; their own proprietary product.

What was even more a bunch of crap, was the actual funds themselves were horrible.

Their track records were bad, their fees were high, and their performance resembled that of a 16-year-old trying to make it in the NFL; it just wasn’t cutting it. Lesson learned: If you’re using an advisor who works for a big company, be on the lookout if they always recommend their own company’s funds.

Just filed my taxes and I’m looking more closely at my finances. I’m pretty good with the basics but feel completely out of my depth with investments.

In 2021 I started a Morgan Stanley investment account with the financial advisor who has been managing my parents’ money for many years.

I invested $67,000 in 2021 and let the advisor choose the stocks/bonds/funds/etc, telling them that I’m extremely risk adverse and I needed safe investments. On Jan 1, 2022, the value was $71,950. On Dec 31, 2022, the value was $58,587. In 2022, I paid $1,025 in trade commissions and $984 in service/advising fees. So basically I paid my advisor $2,000 for her to lose me $13,363 over the course of 2022.

Is this normal? Every time I ask my parents or advisor they tell me “the market is down for everyone.” But my parent love their advisor and thinks the sun shines out her butt and my advisor has a financial incentive to keep me.

I recently started seeing a financial advisor at First Command I met through a mutual family friend. The advisor is obviously very knowledgeable about retirement and investing, but I can't help but think the funds they are suggesting I invest in are more for their profit than my well-being.

They suggested a couple of accounts through Fidelity Advisor that have large percentages to invest in (some of the percentage goes to the advisor). The funds have a good history, but I can't tell if it's a smart move for me or if they are just trying to profit. Additionally, the advisor suggested a whole-life insurance plan.

They explained how they profit from it (basically, the cash value goes to them the first 2 years), but it still seems like a good plan to me.